Marguerite "Dee Dee" McNeil

Marguerite McNeil—DeeDee to family and friends—was a remarkable woman, invaluable to the arts community here in Atlantic Canada and beyond. Like so many, I loved and admired her. She became my mentor and muse. I wrote for her specifically—BETINA in The Weekend Healer, and directed her many times, most memorably as BIG MAMA in Cat on a Hot Tin Roof.

I first encountered DeeDee as a closeted 14 year old kid, languishing dramatically on Cape Breton Island. DeeDee was 42 and had just returned to Glace Bay from New York City where she had been a working actress, and secretary extraordinaire, since she left home at 17. She was offering acting classes. I took the bus from Sydney, unaware that my young mind was about to be blown by a flamboyant, chain-smoking free spirit.

DeeDee introduced me to books and music that expanded my mind. I began to see things in a clearer, sharper light. I confided in DeeDee that I thought I was gay. She said, of course you are dear and that’s just fine.

Years later we reconnected in Toronto. We were a strange duo, often mistaken for mother and son. In many ways she was another mother. DeeDee lived across from the Rondun Tavern on Roncesvalles, a spot we frequented for boozy lunches and her endless stories: a yet to be discovered Robert Redford painted her first New York apartment; James Earl Jones ate everything on the buffet table at a lunch she hosted; she never thought anything would come of the sweet kid with the scratchy voice who busked in the village — the kid was Bob Dylan. We compiled these stories to create her successful one woman show, An Island Woman.

I can’t quite believe DeeDee is gone. And though her passing was sad, it was not tragic — she lived a full life, and made many other lives better. Her wisdom will continue to inspire.

I’ll say goodbye with one of her much quoted lines: “More wine for the Contessa!”

Cheers, DeeDee.

You are missed.